Teen Angst: Cheese with that Whine?

so im really sad about not being able to play the guitar because my lyrics sound really dopey in my head. i wish i could put it to chords but i have like zilch musical prowess. if i had the actual song then maybe i could give it a name.

since ive had no expectations whatsoever about summer i'd say its pretty chill. i must say that im not hanging out as much as i would like to but its okay.

lately i've been waking up in the morning to TRL. sad thing to watch. huh? it's because my room tv doesn't get FUSE and i am too lazy to get to the living room

wednesday i went to the movies with jade and kenny. Superman Returns was a-mah-zing.

thursday was my uncle's civil wedding ceremony reception. saw the cabison side. haven't seen them in awhile.

today i went to my uncle ben's funeral viewing. it was really sad and depressing but we saw joe and therese twice in one week and declared it an accomplishment.

right now i am attempting to stay up before we leave for las vegas. yeah. las vegas for the 20 millionth time. i am so sick of vegas. we leave at 5 AM tomorrow morning. thats in about 6 hours or so. i am really kind of annoyed about it because i can't even stand two days in vegas. so how am i going to last like almost a WEEK. i even brought my summer reading assignment. that's how bored i anticipate i am going to be. i guess my game plan is to hang out by the pool the whole time. and then when i'm not hanging out by the pool i am indulging on room service and other food-type amenities that the resort has to offer. i might even start running. but i think the real reason they are bringing me along is because someone has to babysit William. i don't even get paid rawr. I'll probably convince my mom to let me splurge on some stuff though. we are also going to watch this Cirque du Soleil act that has something to do with Beatles songs? yeah it sounds tacky but it was either that or Phantom of the Opera. and i am sick of Phantom of the Opera. hopefully i can get away with meeting a cute boy or something.

so what i do have to look forward to is later in the week. like disneyland. and pirates of the caribbean: dead man's chest. and then the tuesday after that is VANS Warped Tour and how could i not be excited by that? i've only been waiting since april.

still i wish i could go to Taking Back Sunday + Angels and Airwaves.

oh well.

Jack of Hearts - Original Song Lyrics

[Verse]
You sent your jackhammer
straight through their hearts
chiseled them apart
left them broken and lost.

Now you wanna say you love me?
Well now I wanna say
I've got news for you,
It doesn't work that way

[Chorus]
They told me about you
You're a Jack of Hearts.
You're not hard to find.
Just look for the girls
and their tears trailing behind

You're a Jack of Hearts
but your luck's run out this game
Cuz i'm folding this hand
I'm not going through pain

[Verse]
I closed my eyes,
I picked a card
That's when we met,
you came out of the deck.

I thought you were a King,
But you caught me by surprise
When you proved to me
you were a Joker in disguise.

[Repeat Chorus]

Imagination: A profound thought for a barely 14-year-old girl

Listening to William reading my Hawaiian Dictionary and just laughing made me think since I am currently in a state of thinking since I couldn't go to sleep.

As he was laughing at random phrases just reading the dictionary in the order that the words came in, creating phrases that made sense in a nonsensical, insane way. I was lying in bed, attempting to get a little bit of sleep, I thought that he was stupid and immature and easily amused. Then I thought, how hypocritical, because I was probably like that at one point. Immediately following, came the thought about being innocently amused as a child. Everyone was like that, right? As we grow older, innocently amused turns into easily amused and we roll our eyes at immaturity.

Then I had this thought that I missed my imagination. Childish games like pretend when I used to believe I was an orphan, or a princess, stuff I thought was really fun. Now it would be weird to play like that nowadays, right?

This compelled me to xanga it since I had nothing to do. So here I am now, writing in my xanga, using it as an outlet for my energy. And now my train of thought has come to a sudden halt.

"A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men." - Willy Wonka (Gene Wilder)

A tad hypocritical?

People who criticize suck. Even though I can be critical at least when I criticize, it's funny.

To Ms. Skankwhore:

I ask you, please don't diss cheerleaders when YOU WANTED TO BE ONE!!! That is what really pisses me off. Please do not call cheerleaders preppy. Especially when you generalize ALL of us like that. There aren't any preppy cheerleaders in the first place. If there were preppy cheerleeaders I wouldn't be friends with them. I wouldn't be a cheerleader. We get our attention the positive way. You may not wanna hang with us cuz you think we're preppy but we don't wanna hang out with you because we know you are a slut...the end.